Teenage Dirtbag baby...

Right then, Prom has been and passed. And may I just say. That was possibly the best way to end the year ever. I wasn't nearly as drunk as I thought I'd get, which is a good thing btw, and I actually enjoyed myself. Wooop! Anyway, sorry guys for kinda running away from Hopes. But you see, when you're alergic to pretty much the whole house. It's not fun. I could barely see. As Maria put it, "ANDREW'S EYES ARE GOING TO FALL OUT! CLOSE YOUR EYES ANDREW! THAT'LL SAVE THEM!" Add in a couple of mumbled drunk talk, and you've got what Maria said. Wooo. So anyway, sorry to all you lot. I know I'm considered the "life of the party," but I'm sure you all had a fantastic time.

Right, the things that bugged me about prom. Two questions. Thats all I got asked. First question. "Are you a true Scotsman Andrew?" Followed by a futile and pointless attempt to look up/lift my kilt. What's under my kilt is on a need to know basis. And I decide who needs to know. And thats not you Chris. Sorry. I know it breaks your heart to hear it. Second question/statement. "Whats going on with you and Naomi (S)?" or "Oh Andrew, you're pulling Naomi tonight." or my favourite, "Good luck with Naomi Andrew..." Right people. Lets get this sorted. JUST FRIENDS! What part of that is hard to understand? I might be a guy, but that does not mean I fancy anything with breasts. I do think she is nice. I used to like her. In first year. In fact I went out with her. So get over it. I was just keeping her company. I was trying with someone, but nothing happened. So hey ho. Business as usual I s'pose. Anyway, Teenage Dirtbag. You know the part of the song, when a girl I like comes over and admits she's interested... Well, that songs false advertising. Cause it didn't happen. Stupid song anyway...

This is what kept me going through the night...

I hope that cheered you up.

Anyway, I should rest now, or I think I might collapse.

Peace out bubs.

Andrew out.

I'm not single...

B.
O.
R.
E.
D.

That's what I am. Bored. In fact, I have resorted to reading a joke book for laughs. How low have I sunk...

Here are a few of my favourites...

"I'm not single, I'm just Romantically challenged."

"Whats grey and can't climb trees? A car park."

Inadvisable Chat-up lines...

Do you want to see my collection of Jack the Ripper memoribillia?
You're so much cuter than some of the other trash I've got off with this week.
What's your view on manacles?
I share everything with my best friend.
I'm a lawyer. Trust me.

Blonde Jokes...

What is the mating call of a blonde? I'm sooooo drunk!

Blonde: What time is it?
Man: 2.30
Blonde: Thats weird, every time I ask someone I get a different answer.

Theres tons of jokes now swimming round my head. Not a good thing when you try and look serious. Cause I keep giggling like a school girl. Not a good image.

The jokes above are not directed at anyone, or meant to cause offence. I apologise to all blondes and say that yes, there are intelligent blondes. They dye their hair...

Anyway, I don't have all the photos of my weekend yet. But as soon as I get them, I'll put them up.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

Once more into the breach...

Hello all. Sorry about the wait. Silly broadband hub thingy. Well, all is fixed now. S'all good. At least I hope it is.

Now, I was doing a hike at the weekend. And it hurt my tootsies a lot. Not good. After this 6 and a half mile hike carrying exactly 12.4 kg on my back, I went to sleep. In the morning though, standing. Lots of standing. Standing directing people where to park for a "vintage agricultural machinery societys annual show." No jokes. I spent the weekend at an old tractor rally. Possibly the most entertaining thing I have done in my life so far... Or not. I actually wanted to kill myself within 3 hours. That's actually quite impressive considering that the others wanted to do that within just one.
Also at this, I discovered that I am useless at archery... Oh well, another useless skill I'll never need that I'm crap at. Wooop!

It's almost time. For many important things. Achievement ceremony... Prom... 3rd attempt at driving test... Europe... It's all happening so fast. However, the closest thing to now is Jodies Birthday Bash. I can see this being very entertaining for all involved. *Face palm* You see, I made a promise, quite rashly, that if I could not find a decent Robin Hood costume (The things robin hood themed you see...) for less than £10, I would give in to demand and go as Maid Marion. Yeah... Guess who didn't find a Robin Hood costume for under a tenner. This guy. So, from what I've been told, I'll be wearing a dress (purple) with one of those cone hat things. And a bra. This will go badly for all involved. Mark my words. But, I promised, so I shall grit my teeth and put on the dress. Fantastic. My sense of honour has dropped me in the shitter once again... Oh well, hopefully I can bash my head against a tree enough to make me forget the weekend. I like that plan.

Next thing, Achievements ceremony. Well, I got a letter saying that they'd like to reward me for all the things I did as depute head boy. Personally, I don't see how they can reward my total lack of botheredness in all ways last year. But they want to, so let them eat cake. Even more of a surprise, someone has nominated me for a reward for "effort and progress." Hmm, there's only one thing to do about that... hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahaha. I'm still trying to figure out how I pulled that off.

Next on the list. Prom. The event where the school actively encourages 6th year to get out their faces. Sounds fun. I will drink my champagne. I think that'll be it. Kilt just needs to be picked up. No problems there... (famous last words)

Driving. The bane of my life. For the love of god. I either get the bitch that wanted to fail me the second she looked at me. Or the hot one. God's sake. I panicked. But thats in the past. I will pass this time. Or else. I'm looking at you... Yeah, you. At the laptop...

Finally, Europe. Well, for those that don't know, I'm going to be going round Europe (Mainland) with friends/explorers/brother. (Delete as appropriate.) In this, we have to undergo missions. One of which is to get a haircut in a foreign country. Right, now is the time for someone to tell me how to say "Just a little off" in some other language. Thanks. Another one is to hug a native from each country we visit. Yeah, so "Do you want a hug?" in French is "Voulais vous cous chez avec moi ces cois?" isn't it. Thought so.

Well, wish me luck. Once more into the breach my friends...
Word of advice people, don't promise something that you don't have the balls to do.

I am willing to put photos of my weekend up. However, in return, I want money. Or failing that comments. If I get £20 or 6 comments from 6 people, I will put them up. Thats the deal. No negotiation.


Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

Get a job Andrew.

Right then, mum thinks i should get a job. Dad thinks I should get a job. I think I should get a job. However, I also know what I am doing between now and uni. I have a camp this weekend. A birthday thing the week after. The week after that I have to prepare myself to go to Nottingham for my geek UK finals thing. Three hours after that, I'm away to France and mainland Europe for 15 days. This leaves me 7 weeks till University. I really cannot see anyone hiring me for 7 weeks. I cannot see myself coming back to town for a job that will pay me a little bit more than my train fare home and back. From this, I conclude that for me, the best option is to wait till I go to Edinburgh and try and get a job there. I wouldn't have to commute. I would be able to work for much longer than 7 weeks. Either that, or no job at all. Well, no, thats not an option. Job when I go to uni it is then.
However, I'm pretty sure I'll be "encouraged" to go to the job centre soon. And I'll be expected to come out with a high paying job, with good hours and good overtime. That's what my parents will expect of me. Hmm, I doubt I'll get any of that in these times. Just getting a job would be a stretch. Oh well. I shall remain bored until something interesting happens here... Oh look, a pigeon...

Ever since school has finished, I have been pretty bored. There was the odd occasion that things were livened up, my beach thing for one, but for the most part, I've been wasting my time. I don't like to waste my time because, by extension, thats me wasting my life. I can't get a job (as explained earlier), a vast majority of my friends are still at school, the other friends I know seem to be on msn at different times to me, or fail to text back. I really do not want to be reduced to only this, playing guitar, playing PS3, eating, facebook and formspring. Really, I don't.

Well, back to moping it is. Hope you had a good day today at school or if you were as bored as I am, I feel your pain.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

For those that weren't there.

I went to the beach yesterday. Yay. Go me. And my friends that came with me. Yay. Go them. Well, it was cold, very cold. And wet. But despite all of this. I swam in the sea... So did Alex. Go you. And Jodie. Go you too. Heather and Cat paddled, but that is slightly respectable. Not nearly as respectable as the three of us though. Cause we are awesome. Ain't that right Alex and Jodie? Afterward's I did taste of salt. Hmm, does that go on my daily allowance?

Anyway, my party/beach thing went well. Thanks for asking. Wasn't sure if it was actually going to happen but, eventually, it did. Because once my swimming shorts are on, I must swim before I can take them off. Seriously.
Also, I did kinda promise people a "Beach Party." Well, I say party, it was more of a "mess about at the beach" thing. Hope all you guys had as much fun as I did when I was getting wet...

Also, camping in my garden may ave been a bad idea... I'm not saying it was a bad idea. I'm just admitting there was probably better options. Especially when Erin can't put up a tent... And don't get me started on bringing them back down in the rain...

Well, many things that happened that were amusing to some...
"Stop playing with my giraffe..."
"Do you want a ginger nut?"
The cactus incident.

Hmm, I should do things like that more often. But not for a while. I need to recover first.

One thing annoyed me though. The beach. We went to the beach I mentioned last post. The one I cleaned on Saturday. And it had litter on it. Hmm, now where's my shotgun... Let's go guard the beach from these ne'er do wells.

Sorry to anyone who couldn't make it. Maybe next time. If you weren't invited, you should be nice to me, very nice. Chocolate always helps.

As an afterthought, I now have a formspring thing as well as this. Click here. And ask what you want. It could be about the blog. It could be about me. It doesn't matter. I'll answer as soon as I see it.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

Saving the world, one can at a time.

Right then, I've left school. I'm free to do what I want. So why in gods name am I bored. I could do anything. I could run round the house naked. I could hug random people on the street. I can fly...
Ok, maybe not anything then. But almost anything. I might go outside later. You know, see my friend Mr Sun. I don't see him very often. Maybe I shall catch up with him later when he's not as damn chirpy.
Well, as I sit here wallowing in self pity, I have decided to do lots of stuff when shorty here goes back to school. I'll go to the cinema, the amusement parks, the shops... Or I'll sit inside and play on the PS3. I haven't decided yet. We shall have to see how this goes.

I see that some of my colleagues have got the finger out and blogged again. Good. Don't make me crack the whip like that again. Or else.

Today, I did my part to save the planet. I helped clean a beach. Yay! Go me. I feel like a hero. Well, I did pick up about 20 cans of tennants (two still full), 2 pairs of boxers, a thong, 3 shoes and a huge bottle of wine. Nice. My question would be, "HOW DRUNK DO YOU HAVE TO BE TO LEAVE YOUR UNDERWEAR AND SHOES BEHIND?" I mean, come on. I will accept some people like to drink, but how can you leave important things like that? Some of you lot my age are just so stupid sometimes.

Well, I guess thats the lid on another post. I do only do these when I can't think of anything else to do. So expect more irregular posts. Also, if I'm bored like I have been lately, my posts will get smaller. So sorry about that.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

An advertisement/ a normal post.

I must say that my colleagues lack of blogging has upset me lately. Where are my partners in crime? Chris? Olga? Tamara? ANYONE!?! Come on, I can't keep this up myself. I steal half my ideas from you lot.

Anyway, Dene has asked me to advertise his brand of motivational pictures, so I'll include three below. If you like, let me know and I'll post more. Ok?

Well, I think they're funny anyway.

Moving on. Facebook has taken over my life. Case closed. The only reason I know it's anyones birthday, is when it says "------- birthday (today)" Is this sad? Yes. Does it bother me? Not in the slightest. Should it? Yes. Definately.

Recently I was reminded of a document called "The Guy Code." Basically, it's a series of 69 rules telling every guy what they can/can't do. If they break a rule, they get called princess for the rest of the day. With the shocking rapidity at which I break some of these rules, maybe I should rename my blog to "Princess' adventures in life." Or not. Only time will tell.

You know what I hate. My phone. I send a text, lock the phone and wait for a reply. After 5 minutes I think "Hang on, something's not right", unlock my phone and find "2 pages. Send now?" No, I don't want you to send it. I want you to keep that message between you and me phone... OF COURSE I WANT THE BLOODY THING TO SEND! GO! SEND NOW! It's good to get that off my chest.

Peace out bubs.

Andrew out.

It's catch up time.

As you can see, I have decided to start playing with the format of this thing. Check out the two pictures (theres one at the bottom people) because they make me laugh. Share the joy people. Lets see if everyone else likes them as much as I do. Anyway, I'll change the format every week or two, keep you on your toes.

So, how is everyone? I haven't seen many of you for a long time now. This saddens me. We should all dance and hold hands and skip and have fun together. I mean this. When does everyone want to do this? Seriously. If I haven't seen you recently, get in touch. Now. Do it.

My dad is currently watching Dance music videos. Oh god. This happens occasionally, it's how he stays hip. Who is it now? Ke$ha? Is that how you type it? Is that $ indicate how much it costs to hire you for a stag night... Anyway, I'm listening to "Thats your horoscope for today." The word EPIC comes to mind. Best line- "Your friends all talk about you behind your back... Kill them."

And now the brother has the remote... This means Metal. Oh god. When will it stop...

Hmm, I'm bored... Lets stop this on a high...

Enjoy...

Peace out bubs.

Andrew out.

My funsize post.

Hi everyone. No more exams for me. Yay! Hopefully, you too have reached the end of your exams and put your feet up for the next 7 days before we have to go to school. Wait. Hold on. I don't need to go back... Oh god. That means Mid July- End August I shall be doing very little. At all. I think I shall sleep. Lots of sleep. Sounds good.

So then, Alex was a happy chappy today. Hayley Williams doing silly things with photos on twitter. Silly girl. However, she has just made Alex happy and for that I thank her. Thank you Hayley for giving Alex the shivers.

Chemistry went so well that I decided to treat myself. I got myself a silk tie. A nice red one. Why silk? Why red? Well, silk is strong but soft and the blood won't show up on the red so much when I hang myself. Yes. Chemistry went well indeed.

*Note to readers*- I do not intend killing myself. Stop partying. Also, do not feel that you should go and kill yourself. You don't. Really. Just don't.

Also today Chris, Alex and myself had to finish my Sound Engineering unit. Yay. Woop. The upside to this was Chris's hardcore playing of Freebird on the keyboard. Me and Alex did not have an accident at the solo. Honest.

Well all, enjoy my funsize post.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.