George "the awesome"

Good Afternoon/Evening/Morning/End-of-the-world-party (delete as appropriate) my faithful.

I'm almost, pause for dramatic effect, 18.

However, as I said earlier. My family had my 18th party two weeks early. Where I got my new, trusty and loyal partner George. Here is George.

I HAS UKELELE!

Anyway, yes, I got my ukelele and proceeded to name it. It is George and me and George will have adventures together. Keep reading to see them...

Well, it's pretty easy to begin with. I am expecting it to get harder though. << innuendo much?

Apparently, I'm naturally flirty. I don't see it personally but everyone else know me so much better than I do. So, we'll go with that then. I am flirty and I'm proud! If you think I have ever flirted with you let me know. And I'll let you know if it's deliberate or not. 

RED is a good film. Watch it. I give it **** out of *****.

Peace out bubs.

Andrew out.

A little bit of everything.

You may have noticed the purple. That's for the people who feel that they have to kill themselves because of who they are or who they like. Who you like doesn't matter. Whether you are gay, straight or somewhere inbetween. If both of you feel the same way, you should be happy. If there is no one, then I know it's pretty terrible, but things will get better (eventually).

Anyway, that's my bit for world peace and a bit of tolerance in the world. Just letting you all know.

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Today was a big day for me. I went to see Simon Pegg. He signed my book. =3

He commented on my green chequered shirt. "Whoa, that's a lot of green." and "I could play against you at chess on that. Actually, we could have a tournament."

Probably the best thing that's happened to me recently.

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Long forgotten friends of Andrew.

Hear me now.

If you want to meet up. Message me.

Done.

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My birthday is soon. My 18th birthday. WOOPAH! Presents are not negotiable. Get them. NOW!

(6th of November people. Remember it.)

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This weekend, the McArdle clan will be assembling to celebrate my 18th (two weeks early) I'm expecting lots of pasta. Lots of.

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That'll do for now I think.
A more organised post next time hopefully.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

Hidden post #2

This is a post I've had under wraps for a while though. I've considered it "Hidden post #2" for a long time. I finally feel like I can post it. So here goes. This was written just after I got back from Europe this summer.


Ok, seriously, get out. Every single time something in my life goes right, something goes and messes it up again. Do I not deserve a little bit of luck? Do I not deserve to be happy? Do I deserve pain, misery and messed up memories and dreams all of my life? Cause at the moment, that's all I'm getting. Pain. Misery. Messed up dreams.

I'm fed up of this all. I finally begin to fit in at school, then I leave. I finally start to gain my confidence, and people tear it from me. I finally begin to dream again and now everything that messes up every waking minute of my life messes up my sleeping as well. I haven't slept properly since Saturday. I wake up in the middle of the night, staring at the ceiling, thinking "What did I do?" As far as I can tell, I haven't done anything. I haven't done anything that deserves such constant and determined punishment from the world. All I want is to be happy. I want to be happy and to enjoy being me. I want to not be used mercilessly by people who shouldn't use me. I want to be in a stable relationship that won't involve me getting hurt, cheated on (again) or dead inside. It's taken a lot to get me "feeling" again. And now that I can. I don't like it.

Bring back the nothingness, the oblivion of feeling no pain, guilt, heartbreak or love. At least with that I could sleep for a whole night without waking up either in tears or with a feeling of dread. Every time, I go in too far, I get too close, and no one will ever realise it. I didn't even realise it until recently. I can't help myself. And every time it ends in me getting more and more hurt.

Well, this is present me again. I didn't post this at the time because I didn't think people would read it. I was cleaning up old posts, I found it and I realised that this is MY blog. Posting these things makes me feel better. It's like getting closure on a topic. If you must know, I haven't been sleeping well for a long time and I'm hoping this post will start my recovery again.


Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

The news.

I need glasses peeps.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

Tomorrow shapes my future...

Well, as much as I'd like my post to live up to such an awesome and inspirational title, it isn't. I am not going to discover a cure for aids. Or stop war for ever. Or discover alien life. No, tomorrow, I get my eyes tested.

This is something that has scared me since I was 8. I knew roughly about genetics/inheritance and knew that there was a fair chance I would lose my eyesight partly at some point in my life. Well, I feel it happening. I can see it happening. My long distance vision is slowly blurring. It's not terrible but it's enough to make me notice it, especially during lectures.

So anyway, one of my biggest fears may be realised tomorrow. Hearing that I will need glasses, contact lenses or laser surgery. I don't particularly want glasses... Not because I have anything against glasses or people who wear them, but because I don't suit glasses. At all.

Therefore, if the worst comes to the worst, contacts are getting bought. I'm guessing it'll take a while to get used to them, but once I have, it should become second nature to take them out and put them in. Hmm, I guess this means I could change my eye colour...

That's really all I have for you at the moment. I'll give you a brief update during the weekend about my eyes.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

A post of many topics.

Well then, hello and welcome back to my pit of self depression and pity. I thought I'd try writing this blog the way I did back when I started and see what happens.
Onwards and upwards then...


Today was my first as a real student.


After spending up until closing time in the student union bar drinking with Chrimbo and Irving, I stayed up until 2/3 in the morning doing god only knows what. Now that's stereotypical student. Yeah. I feel proud. 
I then slept until past midday for the first time in my whole life. (Normally I'm up by 10 at the latest) Now that's stereotypical student. Yeah. I feel proud.
I then knocked back as many paracetamol as I could (legally and safely...) and nursed a headache for an hour and a half. Now that's stereotypical student. Yeah. I feel proud.




I asked for your help. And you answered. More than I expected. So, to reward your loyalty, here is a post on all of the comments (at time of writing...) So here is my posts on your comments.


-God/Satan/Reincarnation/Jehovah's Witnesses.-


After having a massive philosophical debate with Zoe earlier. I have a new found belief in something. I'm still attempting to work out what. But the important thing is that I believe right? 
Satan. Well, "I talk to god as much as I talk to Satan cause I want to hear both sides..." <3 the Biff... Anyway, I know very little on this topic. Satan is meant to be the epitome of Evil. He is to be despised and cursed and never trusted. So technically, Satan is Hitler. Yeah, I went there. Me and Chris have a long standing joke of me slipping Hitler into my English essays. So here it is. Also, I like how spell check is telling me Satan is spelt with a capital but god is not. Hmm, obviously Bill Gates has connections...
Reincarnation- If I have to go through all this s**t again, I'll not be happy...
Jehovah's witnesses. If any of them somehow manage to get through the locked door to get to my door, then 
a) I'm assuming they are demons.
 b) I will act accordingly. 
  c) I will get arrested for my following actions.


Barbie. 
Barbie is America's insidious way of corrupting our female (and occasionally male) youths (and occasionally older individuals...) into buying plastic dolls which have unrealistic features and giving them an incorrect view of beauty. Most plastic surgeons are only in business because of Barbie. D**n you Barbie. Cindy would never do that to us.


Annoying things people do...
Oh dear god. Here goes...
Eating loudly, saying they're ugly when they obviously aren't, saying they're ugly when you don't think so, "cutsie-pie" wall to walls, public snogging, people who throw up on the toilet seat and leave it there, dumping Andrew by text... Shagging your best mate, kicking Andrew with high heels, not commenting on my blog, not understanding my complex relationship structures, mocking me for what I do, waiting for you to walk up to a door holding it open then closing it in your face, shouting at Andrew for things he hasn't done. People who are drunk on trains, people who are dedicated to the IRA or whatever it is and who have no tenable links to Ireland. Supporting Celtic or Rangers, dancing naked in public, using blackberries...


This video...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUlw4NT08Ds&feature=related

Well, communism lives... 

It is an epic song though...

BNP-

So, by BNP I'm going to assume you mean the Bangladesh National Party. They are the mainstream center-right political party in Bangladesh. It is currently the largest opposition party in the Jatiyo Sangshad, the Parliament of Bangladesh. They could be compared to the Conservatives. (Wikipedia.)


Being Independent. 
Well, Independence sucks. You have to do everything yourself and the pay is terrible. You want my advice? Live with your mum as long as you can. She knows how to iron. And you don't. So make use of that talent. 


The guy code...
It does not exist. Do not search for it. Especially if you have breasts. Us guys are selfish jerks because we want to be not because of a "code" *shifty eyes*


Why the zombie apocalypse will never happen?
Because Chuck Norris watches over us...


The prominence of Penguins in J-pop.
http://thedragoeffect.wordpress.com/2007/08/25/penguins-seek-world-domination-fla-vor-ice/ 
That should explain all you need to know about penguins and why we should wipe them off the face of the planet.


Why MGT rocks? 
It doesn't. Deal with it Ruari.


Peace out bubs. 
Andrew out.

A little bit more off topic than normal...

Right then guys, I want to use today to talk to you about the impending end of the world situation. Some people think the economy will bring us down. Wrong. Some think that Nuclear Armageddon is the problem. Wrong. Some people even think a conflict between Heaven & Hell will take place with Humanity as it's "No-man's Land". Also wrong.

I am, of course, talking about the impending zombie apocalypse.

Now, before you all go, "Useless drivel" *close window*, hear me out a bit. The thing about living is that it's a thing you don't realise how precious it is until you are going to lose it. If you knew that you were going to die on 21st of December 2012, you would immediately down tools and do something you felt was worth while. (Whether that be hedonistic orgies or mindless destruction is down to you guys really) So, I'm not saying there will be a zombie apocalypse. I am saying, just in case, lets prepare and make sure we protect what is ours, and ours alone. Life.


So, I have this book called "The Zombie Survival Guide" - by Max Brooks. It is a useful start on how to survive an all out attack on humanity by basic, groaning zombies. What do I mean by basic? Well, that would be your standard shambling flesh eater. The kind that groans "Brains..." and tries to bash your head in to get at that coveted prize. Well, as I said, it's a start. Do not rely solely on this book! It has many gaps in it and refers to firearms a lot. If you intend surviving, I'd recommend it as a starting point.


So, this is my input on the matter.

Welcome to Advanced Zombie Tactics...

These are my simple steps to preserving life.

1. Be unseen.

Ok, lets keep this simple. If a zombie hasn't noticed you. Move away quickly but quietly. If it does notice you run, jog or even "Power walk" away (depending on zombie speed) If it catches you then...

2. Knock 'em down.

As many of you know, killing a zombie involves destroying the brain. However, saying you'll do it and actually doing it are two completely different things. The human head (and therefore zombie head) is, in comparison to the rest of the body, tiny. There is no way in hell of you getting a good enough hit to break through the skull (power) and actually hit the head (accuracy) Remember, if you miss, you're wide open to infection and that is number 1 on the list of things to avoid. In fact, here is a list of things to avoid...

• Infection (Zombie virus or STI's or equivalent)
• Zombies (Especially of “Family members”)
• Illness (Of any type)
• Dead Bodies
• Panicked (Uninfected) Humans
• Wild Animals
• Infected (But not zombified) Humans.

3. Lie low. 

Don't go out around a city looking for stuff to loot or for treasure or for "Zombie hunting." Until you have sufficiently mastered surviving, do NOT go looking for trouble and even when you have, don't. Life's a bitch, but it's what stops us being one of them...

4. Only go out for essentials. 

Medicine, food, clean water etc are on this list. NOT X-boxes, Films, Desperate women etc.

5. Help others (but not too much)

Now, as you saw, Panicked (Uninfected) survivors were on the list of things to avoid. Now, I will admit don't go looking for trouble, but when someone's life is in danger, help them. We are all still human. Do not show anyone who you do not trust your base of operations. Do not give any indication on the amount of supplies you have at all. Do not indicate a leader.

6. Stay sane.

The biggest problem with zombies is the Psychological effect of being constantly hunted. Eventually senses dull, you get tired and then BAM you're zombie chow. Sleep in safe locations and leave someone on watch. Do not take off your shoes unless immediate security is assured and even then, not for long. You need to be ready to run at a moments notice. Keep yourself entertained.

Hopefully, this will increase your chances of surviving the impending zombie apocalypse and I won't be the only one left...

However, if you want to be a zombie, this might interest you... LINK

Services will resume as normal next post. (So more crazy stuff and rants then...) 

Peace out bubs.

Andrew out.

My "Diary" and why I hate Facebook at the moment.

Well, I'd like to thank the two people who single handedly kept me sane today. Erin and Tamara. While Heriot-Watt University was abandoned by the vast majority of students here, I would have been alone and insane if they had not visited. So thank you.

Anyway, while they were visiting "da ghetto" two things were pointed out.
1. My room is tiny. (I knew this)
2. A little black book which Erin said "It's Andrew's Diary!"

Well Erin, it isn't. It's what I call my "private blog." It contains sensitive material. Which would destroy the minds and souls of any who read it without first living through the events described.
Well, it's not really, it's where I write some material I'm not sure about posting at the time. So I keep it there. Safe. Until I need it.

I will however show you the first page...

See, front cover. Take that. Anyway, yes, at some point I may show people it, but at the moment I'm not ready to show any of it. Just clearing the air on that topic.

In other news... Under my clothes I am naked. Enough said really.

To finish with, I would like to share with you something which I consider one of my "pet hates" at the moment. Facebook updates (& groups) based on TV show quotes or contestants.

"Why?" I hear you cry...

1. I really, REALLY, do not care about X-factor. Or The In-betweeners. So I really do not want to know what has happened in these shows. Seriously, just stop it. If you like the show so much, watch the show and then go on Facebook afterwards. You do know computers aren't everything right? (says the guy who must rely on his laptop for everything...)

2. Right, as I am impartial on this matter, I would like to discuss Gamu. Let me get this straight. If it's like any other show I've watched, YOU vote for who you want to keep on right? So, who voted for Gamu? Not you? SO STOP COMPLAINING THAT SHE WAS VOTED OFF! 

----If this is not the case, then if you hate Ms Cole so much for voting off Gamu, stop watching and spare me the status updates...----

3. Groups which are purely for a quote from a show are just not funny. Things are funny in CONTEXT. Not on their own. Just reading a stupid line containing three or four swear words IS NOT funny. At all. It's like reading the punchline of a really complicated joke. "Thats my school bag" isn't funny by itself. However with the full joke, it is. (If you want the full joke, you can comment...) Anyway, I do not need to know one line from a show which I do not like. Thank you.

4. These "petition" groups will not make any difference at all. She's gone. Accept it. Also, stop inviting me to join your petition. I don't care.

5. These "quote" groups will start spamming soon. So you'll soon have a group urging you to "DO THIS SURVEY TO GIVE US YOUR PERSONAL DETAILS SO WE CAN SCAM YOU SILLY!" Sound familiar? It will soon. Also, do not invite me to these groups. I do not even wish to waste the energy checking my invites for such useless rubbish and then deleting them.

Hmm, I seem to have ranted quite a bit there... Back to business as normal then.

Peace out bubs.

Andrew out.

My progress so far...

Well hello y'all. Isn't technology wonderful? Yes it is you bunch of hippies. Just go with it...

Anyway, I found a certain screen which is linked to my blog but I previously had no knowledge of. It's called "stats." Guess what I can find on said page? Yes, thats right. Stalker information... Kidding, kidding *shifty eyes*

Anyway, it basically tells me information about my blog. I now finally know my total site view count from when I started. The number as I write this blog is... One thousand one hundred and five.

*Jaw drops*

Umm, you must be sh****g me...

Over one thousand views? The hell? Whats going on here? It's scary to think that my page has been viewed over 1000 times. It makes me think that people actually care. *sniff* And yes, I did check that my page views aren't included. They aren't. So there.

So, after discovering this amazing piece of news I found another link on the page. Called "Audience." So basically, I know where people are viewing my blog from. And how many views are from each country. (I only know general locations, like countries, so you are not going to be stalked...) Obviously, me being from Britain, my vast majority of readers are Brittish. So good on you chaps. But I feel the need to welcome readers who are from other parts of the globe.

"Howdy" to my American viewers.
"Hullo" to my Canadian viewers.
"Olá" to my Brazilian viewers.
"안녕하세요" to my South Korean viewers.

These are my main views from other countries.
Other countries include the Netherlands, Germany/Bavaria, Singapore, Russia & Italy.
So anyway, heres the deal. I would like to know if you are reading this from a country that isn't my own. It's nice to think there are people around the world looking into my life. So please, leave a comment, saying hi (in your own language) and I'll get in touch with you.

What else can I find...

My most popular posts are this, this, and this.

46% of my readers use Internet explorer, 21% use Chrome and 17% use Firefox.

Anyway, what I'm getting at is that I really appreciate you "rabble" reading the ramblings of a simple Scottish boys adventures in life. Hopefully I can continue to provide a service which people will enjoy. Hopefully, my blog will spread even further into more and more countries. Hopefully it will spread into so many countries that I will effectively control the world... What, too soon?

My video blog will be continuing soon. Just hang on in there.
Also, I will smile in future videos. For the first few videos  I needed complete concentration to work this infernal contraption, therefore, I frown. Sorry bout that. I'm getting the hang of it though.


So that's my progress in the world domination front. I think it's coming along quite nicely. Spread the word people...

And that word is legs...

( Remember to make Andrew happy by clicking like or dislike at the top! =] And make him ecstatic by leaving a comment. =D )

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

5 things I like about me...

Well then, I promised you all this. So I'm going to do it. For those of you who are concerned with me at the moment due to changes in my life. Don't be. I'm ok. So don't sweat it. I'm more concerned with stuff none of you know and I don't want to talk about at the moment. But it's no biggie. So don't worry.

5 things I like about me...


1. My outlook on life...


I consider myself as a "pessimistic optimist." While some people would view the glass "half empty" and some view it as "half full" I have a different look to it. I think it isn't how full the glass is that matters. It's what's in it. And how enjoyable I would find drinking it. Personally, if the glass was half filled with water that doesn't fill me with optimism (unless I was dying of thirst...) and if it was half empty of Irn-Bru I would be thrilled. I could finish the Irn-Bru and enjoy it while it lasted. It's quite a bit to get your head round I know. It took me years to work this out. Put simply, I don't worry about things if I can help it. I enjoy things while I can.

2. My perfectionistism... (yes that is a word.)


I believe that if a jobs worth doing, it's worth over doing. If I enjoy something, I will put my heart and soul into it. I like blogging. That's why it takes me a while to write one. I want to think about how other people would perceive this. I want to make sure I haven't made any major spelling or grammatical errors. I take pride in what I want to do. However, the flip side of this is that anything I don't enjoy (or don't want to do) will be a half-ars** effort from me. I just don't have enough energy to be a proper perfectionist.

3. Loyalties...


As quite a few people have told me, I have a somewhat weird sense of loyalty. If I believe someone is my friend, even if they aren't, I would help them when I could. If I know someone is my friend, I would go out of my way to defend them. And as for those people that mean the world to me, I'd do anything to keep them safe. In the past, this has got me into trouble (defending my brother, fighting people who insult my friends etc) but I believe it's worth it. Even though I rarely get thanked for it, I'd do it anyway.
If I give a promise to someone, I keep it. (which is why I rarely give "unending promises" they can get complicated)
My loyalty also applies to things that I use. I am "a creature of habit." I will always try and use the same computer. I'm pretty sure unless something major happens, I'll stay on Blogger. Purely because it does what I ask it to. And I'm used to it.

4. My averageness...


Well, when I look at myself, sure I think "You could be better Andrew," but I don't consider myself "ugly." I think I am firmly stuck in the "Not a great looker, but he's all right" place in life. It's a nice place to be. It means I can blend in to the background if I want but I can also "show off" if I feel the need. (that's not very often though, I need to give other guys a chance...)
I also used to be considered a geek at High School. (King of the Chess Team FTW!) but here, I am considered normal. I am not a jock. I am not an emo. I am not a skater. I am not a geek. I am normal and as such I can be who I want.

5. Quick thinking...


When a problem rears its ugly head in my life, I deal with it by thinking quickly and acting when I can. For some reason, I don't seem to panic. At all. It's almost as if I skip that step. When the need arises I act. For example, once on a holiday,
  I was on Homps "- the devil boat." It was "the devil boat" because it seemed to resist doing what we told it at all times... Anyway, we were going under a low bridge, when suddenly we heard an "OUCH" and a splash. Once I was on the deck, I saw my dad in the river after he had decided to headbutt a bridge. So, while my family panicked, I went to pick up the rope he had been tying up and pulled him in.
So, as you can see fast reactions are handy.
However, there are some times when I think too much and then it's annoying. But I get through. I just need to learn to disengage the noggin occasionally and just act.

Anyway, I believe that is all I need to do to satisfy the title. 5 things I like about me. It feels weird talking about yourself positively, but I think everyone should try it. It makes things just seem a little better. And trust me, I know.

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.

5 things I hate about me...

Well, I have recently been suffering from what I call "plumbers nightmare." No, not diarrhoea. No, nothing to do with my "plumbing" but simple writers block.

I have been thinking about doing this topic for a while now and due to my lack of ideas it is coming out in all of it's full glory. So, here it is. 5 things I hate about me.

1. My sense of humour...

"Andrew, you have a very 'dry' sense of humour." - Ms Richardson (3rd year English)

This comment was given to me after a reflective essay. It was the first of many times I was told how I should be able to improve my writing. (It is also the only time I ever paid attention in English) This is the only reason I got my Int 2 A (and probably what stuck me in my Higher C)

 Deadpan is a form of comic delivery in which humour is presented without a change in emotion or body language, usually speaking in a casual, monotone, solemn, blunt or matter-of-fact voice and expressing an unflappably calm, archly insincere or artificially grave demeanor. This delivery is also called dry wit when the intent, but not the presentation, is humorous, oblique, sarcastic, or the effect is apparently unintentional. - Wikipedia (Deadpan/Dry Humour) 

This is how I have styled my writing ever since. It is how I have styled myself and my jokes in life. It has worked remarkably well... Until now.
Now that I am at Uni, my "Deadpan humour" isn't the most popular style. It's quite far down actually. Now that we have so many people around, you have to be "loud and proud." And this brings me to my next point...

2. Shyness...


I, blogger of feelings, maker of video blogs, ex-guitarist in a band, ex-always-first-to-volunteer-for-school-shows, am incredibly shy. I struggle to form relationships with anyone. I struggle to make conversation with new people.
I think this has something to do with how I was brought up... All through my childhood, I felt like a bit of an outsider for some irrational reason. This "irrational" fear that I am somehow, a freak, has been deeply ingrained into my mind and I can't shake the feeling about it.

3. My nose...


Genetics has gifted me with an incredibly long face, a large brain (not as handy as you might think) and an incredibly large nose... It's very handy for the other members of my family (who all wear glasses) but not so for me (who doesn't) I do know that this is may be bordering on "Oculist" (prejudiced against glasses) but I do not want glasses. Ever. I look enough like my brother as it is without needing to put glasses on my face as well. Unfortunately, also due to genetics, I am almost 100% guaranteed to need glasses. I think all of my direct relatives need glasses and I am slowly losing my long distance vision. Not good. 


4. My ability to take some things too seriously...


Sometimes, I can take things way too seriously. For example, a friend makes a joke about me and I don't talk to them for a week. This drains some of my much needed "friend-power" (I need as much as I can get...) and I can't stop myself. Sometimes, I wish I could laugh about this kind of thing at the time. I can laugh afterwards perfectly fine, but it's too late by then if I'm honest.

5. My addictive personality...


I have an addictive personality. Period. It doesn't take a lot to get me hooked on something. Facebook - 1 day. Bejewled Blitz - 30 seconds. Alcohol - Born that way.
This is why I have never smoked a cigarette. I fear for my finances, health and social life. I'm pretty sure I would be hooked very quickly. And it's not something I find attractive, cool or hygienic in other people, so it would tear me apart if I was addicted as I fought myself draw after draw.

That has been 5 things I hate about me. However, I have three final messages to put on this bad boy post of a blog...

1. Happy Birthday Olga... The cake's on her.
2. Happy 69th post all... The cake's on me.
3. A friendly Competition.


Complete the following sentence. (and post it in the comments on this or on my link on faceboogle...)


"The thing I like about myself is..."


I will be posting the 5 things I like about me in my next post, so I would like to know the best, the best, the best of yoooo... *foo fighters <3*


 Please use the "like and dislike" buttons at the top of each post. I do actually care what you all think. 

Peace out bubs.
Andrew out.